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Speed ontheBeat Speed ontheBeat Author
Title: Rem's Rant: Fatherhood, Writing, and The Connection to Clarity
Author: Speed ontheBeat
Rating 5 of 5 Des:
From Rem:  It’s been a little while since I've written anything. As a writer, I find myself hitting more roadblocks than a crash test d...
From Rem: It’s been a little while since I've written anything. As a writer, I find myself hitting more roadblocks than a crash test dummy. So, with that I've elected to take this time to talk about what my life has been like in the time that I've put down the pen. I ask that you bear with me as it may seem that my thoughts are running rampant.

From the recurring experiences with women, love (or lack thereof), parenthood, and general manhood my life has been what Drake would rap about on a loop in what would be considered some of his best work. (For all you Take Care fans) I've recently uprooted my life back home in Baltimore for a more peaceful & meaningful inhabitance in Colorado Springs. But, why now? The answer to the question comes as both simple and complex depending on how you perceive it. But to me, it's as unpretentious as I deem it considering there wasn't much left in the way of progress remaining in the same place. Insert Mannequin Challenge jokes here.

As things become more clear to me, prioritizing life at 25 years old seems to be the most prevalent thing to do. And as for the list of recurring things, you can kind of figure out what should and does mean the most to me.

Fatherhood.



With an ever-growing, inquisitive, intelligent, handsome, and curious 4-year-old son, the purpose of MY life as of late has been to never miss another moment of HIS. A time or two in the past I've found myself writing about the conditional aspects of love as it relates to my relationships with women. Unbeknown to me was the sentiment of agape love intertwined with that of a child's love and just how unwavering it is. Furthermore, prompting me to explore the thing that I felt was the most elusive, the unconditional love that comes with being a parent. And, trust me, the scariest thing is not being present to experience the one thing that could fill the void of ignorance in being receptive to said emotion ("The Unconditional Condition 3" is on the way, by the way).

You must understand that in my case writing has been a gift and a curse over the years in wanting to express myself to an audience whilst remaining transparent enough to be considered relatable. I've had to find several innovative ways to hang myself from the cross in an attempt to utilize my experience to possibly shape someone else's. The true difficulty for me was finding a happier place to express from to eliminate the ideology that I'm an angry black man expounding upon the things that have either hurt me or molded me into who I currently am.

I never realized how easy it is to write from such a dark place and the negative effects going back to read some of that stuff has on not only me but my audience in wanting to be past it. So, here's to further expression from the happy place being around my son day in and day out has placed me in. The hardships, good times, the smiles, and frowns have been the catalyst to some of the happiest points in my life to date.

As I gear up to produce the type of writing contingent upon my continued elation, I'll ask that my audience shed themselves of all the negative factors that make consumption a reality for them. Let's take this jubilant journey together to be better.

Until then...

-Rem

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