Wednesday, October 29, 2014

The Return is Coming

I know. It's been about a month since I've posted any real news/thoughts on That's what happens when you're writing for somewhere between 3-5 blogs, including your own. Fear not, for the return is coming.

More snark, more bite, more reviews, and (possibly) more booty gifs.

So, be prepared. It'll be here sooner than you think.
-Speed on the Beat

Friday, October 3, 2014

So...about that new Jeezy...

Harvey Levin, give me a job.

So, unless you've been living under a rock for the past couple days, you've probably heard that Young Jeezy (above) has been hit with a lawsuit for "Me Ok." Per the lawsuit, Wisconsin rapper Big Chris (real name Christopher Syrrakos) actually put this song out five years ago, under the name "13 Shots." Now, I'm not TMZ. I don't like to go in on "rumors" and the like. However, a quick Google search of "Christopher Syrrakos" brings up the TMZ page and the Def Jam/Jeezy suit. It also brings up several court cases against him (along with a poorly-written page on his record label; at least if you're gonna "lie" about having a label, use proper English). Most of these cases, per reading through them, have "Big Chris" being evicted and slapped around with fines with someone I'm going to assume is/was a girlfriend.

I'm no expert, but a "rapper" coming out of the woodwork, claiming copyright infringement, who's only records (in any way, shape, or form--he's not even on Soundclick) are court records? It doesn't look good for Big Chris's chances. Especially since, you know, the song or his album are no where to be found. Another search on the US Copyright database for "Christopher Syrrakos" shows that there are no results to be found. And a search for "13 Shots" showcases nothing by Big Chris. So, unless this copyright was just written on a piece of cardboard, and "copywritten" through the "I'll just send this to myself in the mail" foolishness, I've only got one thing to say.

Wednesday, October 1, 2014

Lumidee - Lumi Mini-Review

I'm trying to turn over a new leaf in music. I want to cast aside the days of acerbic wit and stinging commentary and replace them with a kinder, gentler Speed on the Beat.

At least the cover art is cool, right?

After hearing Lumidee's newest mixtape, those kinder, gentler times will have to wait at least one more day.

The former "Never Leave You (Uh Oooh, Uh Oooh)" singer returns to a game that's changed a lot in the decade-plus since she first dropped that infectious single. Female singers who can spit a dope bar or sixteen are damn near a dime a dozen (and vice versa), digital releases are commonplace, and New York isn't the de facto, go-to spot for the newest hip-hop trends. So, what's a girl to do? Well, on Lumi, released earlier this week, Lumidee:
  • Gets her 2006-era YouTube mainstream remix on--complete with looped instrumentals straight out of 2003 ("Hideaway," "3005," and "Shake It Off" get this treatment)
  • Gets her The Weeknd/Jhene Aiko on.
  • Gets her Major Lazer on.
  • Seems a bit confused as to whether she wants to return as a rapper who can sing, or a singer who can rap. 
  • Does neither of the above all that well.
  • Doesn't do too much to get the world popping off about her again.
  • Gets washed by her guest stars, who range from Termonlogy to Chris Rivers.
Now, Lumidee has a top-ten hit and I've probably been hit ten times by a car (not all at once, though). But, this isn't "hate." A boring mixtape is a boring mixtape, regardless of who puts it out. If I put out something boring, I'd say "holy crap, this is boring as hell. Walk away." But, for those waiting on Lumidee to have a U.S.-based comeback, this isn't it. It's not a bad mixtape per se, it's just boring as all hell. It brings absolutely nothing that awe-inspiring to the table. Plus, the production aside from a few standouts, sounds like something I would've (ahem) "borrowed" from someone's Soundclick when I still thought about sexing Treeka or some foolishness.

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